here is my first attempt:
Madame Curie and Terry Shibo Meets Jack Kevorkian
They told me today I have a brain tumor, small
they said, and not malignant. In my dream of Terry Shibo,
a redneck walks through her room with his rifle and hunting dogs.
A small brown bird flutters in the small brown grass. Its heart
falls out in my hand. But no, it's the telephone
spewing words. Brain tumor. The bird lifts
from the grass—brain tumor—and flying low, disappears
into an ocean of grass. One little brown bird.
The hunter shoots anything the moves, but Terry Shibo
doesn't move. The grass doesn't move
around her. I search the swamp and hemlocks for a stump
or log, a place to sit. No one asked me if I was sitting
when they said, brain tumor. Once, Dante called to read me a poem.
In my dream of Terry Shibo, the sun hangs orange
in the cage of her ribs and sings like Maya Angelou.
I was on my way out the door. Are you sitting down?
Dante asked. I sat. I sat for seven hours, his words echoing
in my head. I am Beatrice he said. I am Narcissus and you my pool,
my mirror. I am Dante, he said, and you
are the seven layers of hell.
A woodpecker hammers a tree, drums
and drums. Today, no one asked me if I was sitting,
They let me stand, staring, while they said, brain tumor.
In my dream of Terry Shribo, bees have made
honey in her skull. Loud in the swamp around me,
peepers sing. A woodpecker hammers. Her brain is honeycomb,
honey seeps onto her tongue. In all that darkness
something sweet. Or the memory of something sweet. Hazy
in the hemlocks, the sun sinks. I think about morphine, about making a will.
About surgery and radiation. Around me, the woods darken. Geese fly over.
Or the memory of nothing at all. In my dream of Terry Shibo, her eyes flicker
and open. In those blank pools, she sees the sun sizzling into the ocean.
A geyser of steam erupts in the newborn darkness.
Around me, trees are dreaming themselves a forest.
There's a hole in their dream where I sit.
Mary Stebbins 060401a, 060330a
A highway runs through your dream. Harleys rumble,
Hell's Angel Harleys, and big semis. A little platoon
of matching yellow cars flits through the semis, a flock of goldfinches,
a school of fish. You spot a deer standing at the edge
of the road, know it is about to die, to be thrown
up over the hood of a red car that will careen into the side
of an SUV and they will roll into the ditch at your feet.
Crumpled. You want to wave your arms to head off the deer,
but your arms are timbers from the mast of a ship.
The ship founders on rocks. Fog. You know now
you're dreaming because you wouldn't mix metaphors
awake. You're trapped in the dream, surrounded by Harleys
revving their engines, skulls grinning, knowing that deer
will drown soon, knowing that you will fall
through green water
tangled in the limbs
of the drowned deer
forever.
Mary Stebbins, 060329b, 060328b
Jack Horner Berates Julia Child outside the Montana Museum of Natural History
Perhaps you fed me the petrified eyelash of a dinosaur.
Birds have eyelashes, those feathered dinosaurs,
think of the ostrich, batting its thick translucent lids
and smiling coyly. An eyelash, you said, pointing,
to my omelette. But it was only the edge
of a bubble of oil. Grease, you called it,
but when I looked horrified, you said, yummy grease,
as if adding the word yummy would make it okay.
The eyelash reappeared in a stew, then in a sandwich,
then on my steak. It grew and grew. Not a coprolite, precisely,
not the imprint of a giant fern or the wing of a pterosaur, just that eyelash.
The tyrannosaur who lost it thrashes in my belly.
Mary Stebbins, 060329a, 060328b
Mary Stebbins, 060329a, 060328b
Patty Hearst Dreams of Persephone Lost On Cadillac Mountain
A highway runs through your dream. Harleys rumble,
Hell's Angel Harleys, and big semis. A little platoon
of matching yellow cars flits through the semis, a flock of goldfinches,
a school of fish. You spot a deer standing at the edge
of the road, know it is about to die, to be thrown
up over the hood of a red car that will careen into an SUV.
They will roll in the ditch at your feet.
Crumpled. You want to wave your arms to head off the deer,
but your arms are timbers from the mast of a ship.
Somewhere, fog. A ship founders on rocks. You know now
you're dreaming because you wouldn't mix metaphors,
awake. You're trapped in the dream, surrounded by Harleys.
They're revving their engines, skulls grinning. Soon
the deer will drown
and you will fall
tangled
through green water
in the limbs
of drowned deer
forever.
Mary Stebbins, 060329c, 060328b
Patty Hearst Dreams of Persephone Lost On Cadillac Mountain
There's a highway running through your dream, with Harleys,
Hell's angel Harleys and big semis and a little platoon
of matching yellow cars. You know that deer standing
at the edge of the road is about to die, to be thrown
up over the hood of a red car that will careen into the side
of another and they will roll into the ditch at your feet.
You want to wave your arms and head off the deer, but
your arms are timbers from the mast of a ship
that has grounded on rocks in the fog. You know now
you're dreaming because you wouldn't mix metaphors like that
in your waking life, but you're trapped in the dream anyway,
surrounded by Harleys revving their engines, skulls grinning,
knowing that deer will drown soon, knowing that you will fall
through the green water tangled in the limbs of the drowned
deer forever.
Mary Stebbins, 3-28-06
Patty Hearst Dreams of Persephone Lost On Cadillac Mountain
There's a highway running through your dream, with Harleys,
Hell's angel Harleys, and big semis and a little platoon
of matching yellow cars. A flock of goldfinches, a school
of fish. You know that deer standing at the edge
of the road is about to die, to be thrown
up over the hood of a red car that will careen into the side
of another and they will roll into the ditch at your feet.
You want to wave your arms and head off the deer, but
your arms are timbers from the mast of a ship
that has grounded on rocks in the fog. You know now
you're dreaming because you wouldn't mix metaphors like that
in your waking life, but you're trapped in the dream anyway,
surrounded by Harleys revving their engines, skulls grinning,
knowing that deer will drown soon, knowing that you will fall
through the green water tangled in the limbs of the drowned
deer forever.
Mary Stebbins, 3-28-06 060328b
Patty Hearst Dreams of Persephone Lost On Cadillac Mountain
A highway runs through your dream. Harleys rumble,
Hell's angel Harleys, and big semis. A little platoon
of matching yellow cars flits through the semis, a flock of goldfinches,
a school of fish. You spot a deer standing at the edge
of the road, know it is about to die, to be thrown
up over the hood of a red car that will careen into the side
of an SUV and they will roll into the ditch at your feet.
Crumpled. You want to wave your arms and head off the deer,
but your arms are timbers from the mast of a ship
that has grounded on rocks in the fog. You know now
you're dreaming because you wouldn't mix those metaphors
in your waking life, but you're trapped in the dream anyway,
surrounded by Harleys revving their engines, skulls grinning,
knowing that deer will drown soon, knowing that you will fall
through the green water tangled in the limbs of the drowned
deer forever.
Mary Stebbins, 060329a, 060328b
Not a Poem: Patrick Lawler follows St. Francis Down the Freeway
Because it's a solar oven, I sit in the car with door open. I read a Patrick Lawler poem from his new book, Feeding the Fear. Then I read another. While I am reading, clouds of shadow pass over the page, roiling and twisting. Heat radiation. The sun bends through it reaching toward the words. They escape like smoke. I tumble into the hooting coos of mourning doves. This is not a poem, I say. This is mortality. We dream the world solid. I bang on it with my fist. See, I say to no one in particular. To Dante, to Persephone, to you, see? It's not a dream. It's too hard to be a dream. Too difficult. It's real. My hand hurts, and the banging echoes in my head. I wake up. It's morning. I brush my teeth, start frying eggs. Then I wake up again. I'm in this car and it is driving down the road by itself. No one is steering. The car goes faster and faster. Careens down a hill. But I'm okay. I'm reading this poem by one of the Patrick Lawlers, reading through shimmering shadows, through heat and dove song, and I know this is just a dream. Mary Stebbins, 060328
Not a Poem: Patrick Lawler follows St. Francis Down the Freeway
The car's a solar oven; I leave the door open. Inside, feet hanging out, I read a poem from Patrick Lawler's new book, Feeding the Fear. Then another. Clouds of shadow pass over the page as I read, twist and weave. Heat radiation. The sun bends through it reaching toward the words. They escape like smoke. I tumble into the coos of mourning doves. When I stand again, they gather on my arms and shoulders in pairs. This is not a poem, I say. This is mortality. We dream the world solid. I bang on it with my fist. See, I say to no one in particular. To Dante, to Persephone, to you, see? It's not a dream. It's too hard to be a dream. Too difficult. Too real. The thumping hurts my hand and echoes in my head. I wake up. It's morning. I brush my teeth, start frying eggs. Then I wake up again. I'm in this car and it is driving down the road by itself. It goes faster and faster. Careens down a hill. In most dreams, I'd be terrified, but I'm okay. I'm reading this poem by one of the Patrick Lawlers, reading through shimmering shadows, through heat and dove song, and I'm safe because I know this is just a dream. Mary Stebbins, 060328b
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